Holy Henry, I got a job. I DIDN'T EVEN HAVE TO INTERVIEW TO GET THIS JOB. I just dialed a phone number and said my name. MICHAEL CONTI. That's all it took. Next thing I know I have a job and I'm buying slacks with my mum.
An older black man helped me at the department store. "Young man. Try these on." he'd say while my mother nodded in agreement. Those two had me try on 50 pairs of slacks! Boy o boy! I broke a sweat from extending and zipping, folding and hanging.
Cut me some slacks, won't you?
Haha, comic gold! I want to tell that joke to a bunch of children. Their tiny laughs would raise my spirits and invade my lungs with goodspirit. I wouldn't smile at the children. Only inhale them as their laughs continued.
I work in a large blue building off of Chimney Rock. Won't you stop buy? Bring me a calzone or a pierogie and wish me luck at my new position. Perhaps you could comment on my slacks. Buy me a gift or kiss me on the mouth. It would be the right thing to do.
Also, could someone sign me up for eharmony, so I can start dating women in their 30's? Thanks.