Do you have any honey?

Jesus in Heaven I want to eat some honey with Winnie the Pooh. That guy loved eating honey. He really did. I liked Winnie the Poohs voice. I could tell that he was hungry for some honey. He would get his nose stuck in the pot, thats how much he loved honey. Winnie the Pooh could not wait for the honey to drip down into his mouth, so he would stick his mouth in the pot.

I liked the episodes when Winnie the Pooh would get distracted from a task because he wanted to eat some honey. Also, Winnie didn't have any fingers but he still ate honey. Sometimes bees would get furious at Winnie the Pooh for stealing the honey, but Winnie just didn't know any better. He simply loved eating some honey.

Sometimes Winnie wouldn't want to do something, but you could convince him to do something for you if you gave him a pot of honey. That's because Winnie loved honey, and would do anything it took to eat some. I like that attitude. Winnie had a great attitude.

There was this one episode where the wind blew a baby bird away from her mom. I hated that episode because it made me cry, and also, I don't recall Winnie eating any honey during that episode.

Also that rabbit made me furious because he was always whining. Why couldn't that rabbit just relax? Also I remember he had a stove at his home. I hated that stove for some reason.

The owl was smart, I guess. He read the dictionary. That was pretty gay. If I were an owl I'd fly around at night and eat some rats. I'd move around my neck and hoot when I saw some rats. Not sitting around and look at the dictionary all day.

Nervous pigs were involved as well. I'm talking about Piglet. He was a small nervous pig that always worried about frienship. I wish his sweater were a different color though. You shouldn't wear flesh colored turtle necks. It's not becoming.

Tigger loved to tackle people. He was energetic and brave. What a handsome beast. Sometimes he'd tackle Winnie when he was eating some honey! Can you imagine how Winnie felt? Just eating some honey and then being tackled by Tigger? Oh boy. Those two! What a confident cat.

Eeyore was a sad, lovable donkey. He didn't want to bother anyone. He moved very slow and spoke even slower. You know this, why am I even telling you? I don't know about you, but I wanted to give Eeyore a big hug. Pet his mane and tell him he was a good donkey.

Anyways this weekend I am going to eat a few pots full of honey. Just lick that honey and enjoy it like Winnie would. Steal some fresh honey from the bees. I'll let you know how it goes.


House of Suz said...

Don't get your nose stuck in the Honey Bucket!

Melissa said...

That's pretty much the gayest thing I've read all day.

Conti said...

Thanks whore.

TinaPoPo said...

The other day I was cleaning out our pantry and I found an unopened jar of honey. "What's this doing in here?" I thought to myself, "What am I supposed to do with this honey?"
Now I know.
Mail it to Conti.
Problem solved.

Starlet said...

I wish there was something I loved as much as Pooh loved honey. sigh.

hans q. bungle said...

you remain the best.

myspace said...

Steak Face

Last Updated:
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Friday, August 25, 2006

so yeah, this is a real post. not a plea for views

You know what would be awesome? If you, like, dipped fresh strawberries in a huge pot of melted gold. And then you went to this carnival and just gave the golden strawberries to little kids. And the kids were, like, so happy, and they always remembered it even when they grew up. And then, like, they formed the Golden Strawberry Club. And they met every week just to talk about their golden strawberries and how happy they made them.

You know what would be awesome? If there was, like, this old man who was really down on his luck. Like, his wife divorced him, his kids hated him, and he just lost his job? And then he went into this Indian casino. And, like, he gambled all day and ended up losing his life savings. But then the Indians were really nice to him, and he, like, joined their tribe? And then he found out that he was all spiritual and happier with the Indians then he was with his job and money.

You know what would be awesome? If this kid had a terrible disease. And he, like, went to this new age doctor. And the doctor told him that the cure to his terrible disease would be to eat as much spaghetti as possible. And so his mom made him a lot of spaghetti, and, like, it worked? Like the kid didn't have his disease any more.

You know what would be awesome? If I could get off of the computer and go have some fun instead of sitting here like a dope.

12:06 AM - 1 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment

Miss Liz Enthusiasm

But I like dope

That conversation that you posted was pretty much the most amazing conversation of my life, although i didn't realize it at the time, i do now

Have fun drinking with your family, I think...


Posted by Miss Liz Enthusiasm on Friday, September 01, 2006 at 10:20 PM
[Reply to this]

elginroots said...

when are you coming to chicago?

Conti said...

hmmm interesting myspace...good find, I may have to address that.

pbdotc said...

wow .... are you getting plagiarized?

that is a pisser if so but also kind of beyond awesome.

Variant E said...

So what was up with Gopher? He wasn't in the books; he was added to the movies. Did they feel they had to make up a new character when they made the movies? As if the original 8 weren't enough?

erin said...

when i was little my dad played pooh sticks with me and my brother? remember pooh sticks? also my uncle pretty much sounds exactly like winnie the pooh. so anyway i guess we should get married or something.

Christine said...

I miss the smurfs. Pooh was cool too though.

L'Austin Translation said...

You could always attend Eeyore's birthday party. I hear it's pretty swanky- 82529376589735 hippies and all.

But no honey that I know of. Sorry.