12.15.2005

Ham

My birthday is in one month and one day. I'm going to throw a party at my apartment. I'm going to invite exactly 44 people. When everyone arrives, we will silently eat ham sandwiches together. No talking or laughing or anything. No noises. No one will be able to move around either. Just sit quietly and eat a ham sandwich. Then everyone will get into a single file line and leave my apartment. After the party I'll vacuum the floor for any crumbs and say a prayer to Jesus.

16 comments:

Ajax said...

Wow, I didn't realize you were so old. I guess people say "life starts at 44".

Good job being old.

Hey check out my blogg if you get a chance. Perhaps it's not your thing, but everybody loves a little mexican from time to time.

Steph said...

I think this might be the party of the year. Can you please up the invite list to 45? For me? hehe

Sean said...

That's unfortunate for you. On that day I will be having a salami party right down the street from you. I already have commitments from 40 of your friends. What can I say? They like salami more than ham.

Melissa said...

I know I'LL be invited but I'm just letting you know ahead of time that I can't attend because I'm Jewish and we hate ham.

Conti said...

I'm turning 44-20+10-10. And damn you Sean. And maybe Steph. And sorry Jews and Arabs.

emertron said...

May I attend via speaker phone? Wait, I guess that wouldn't matter, then. Could I be on speaker phone & try & make you laugh?

Steph said...

um, ya, can you repeat that please? i'm bad with math. oh, and I referenced you on my blog today. jus sayin.

Queen Of Pink said...

So you're gonna be 38? Or is my math off? I don't go to the funny blogs to have to think dammit.

Melissa said...

Ha! 24! I'm a genius!

ica said...

Looks like you're into concept parties as well.

Rod Renegade said...

I don't think Jesus would eat one of your ham sandwiches, unless he cast the demons out first... I think... or unless he were just some hispanic guy who was hungry...

scout said...

er...wow.

explauren said...

I can't go, I'm really busy that day

ambs77 said...

heh heh.

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