I was 17 and asleep. That's when it happened. This is all true, too.

I was in my room in Sugar Land, sleeping like a high school student. I sleep on my stomach, so I woke up with a faceful of pillow. I woke up feeling different. Not bad. Not sick. Just different. I turned to the right and looked at my alarm clock. 3:11. Why the hell did I wake up? I always sleep through the night. If a dragon flew into my bedroom and began chewing my leg I wouldn't wake up. Yeah something was definitely odd. Then I looked towards the window on the left and knew why I was awake.

A ghost was at the base of my bed. I swear to you: a ghost was at my bedside, chilling out near my legs. I'd never seen a ghost before but I knew the second I looked over that this was a ghost. It didn't look like a powder white, transparent person like you see in the movies. It was just a fuzzy circle. I didn't see a face or any limbs or anything, just this hazy blob of activity.

I wasn't afraid when I saw the ghost. This ghost was NOT a scary ghost. I did NOT jump back or scream. I just looked at this fuzzy circle ghost. There was no speaking - I wasn't sure if this was an American ghost so I didn't bother asking any questions. Plus I had just woken up and didn't want to insult the ghost by clearing my throat before addressing it. So me and this ghost just stared at each other for a while.

Then, for a reason I cannot explain, I began to masturbate.

It just felt like the right thing to do.

I was pretty sure thats why this ghost woke me up. The ghost wanted to watch me masturbate. So it happened. I masturbated for this ghost.

There's really not much else to tell. After I finished I was able to fall asleep almost immediately. I didn't even think much of the whole incident when I woke up the next morning. In fact I hadn't thought about the whole thing in years. It's like: I masturbated for this ghost, no big deal, ya know?

I'm pretty sure the ghost was some hot dead chick who was watching me in heaven. She was so into me that she flew down one night and had to have me. I knew she was a chick ghost because it was really easy for me to get excited. Ghosts don't turn me on normally but this one did the trick.

I haven't been visited by any ghosts since. That's okay by me - I'm cool with the whole one night only thing. I hope ghosts don't read bloggs though...I'd hate for other ghosts to find out and think that this ghost was a skank or something.

Have a good weekend.


el Bow said...

If a dragon (or even a badger) is eating your leg while you sleep, you should really make an effort to get up. If they're allowed to once, they'll get into the habit of eating your legs every night.

Conti said...

Only 1 comment...I guess I need to stop telling masterbating with ghosts stories...yikes.

Conti said...

3 comments now!


Conti said...

how bored am i that im commenting on my own blog.


seeeeeee yaaaaaaaaaaa

Ajax said...

You can get into a lot of trouble having sex with ghosts.

Melissa said...

I once read a story about a female ghost raping a living man but he didn't tell anyone about it because he was ashamed that he had been raped by a female.Apparently the fact that she was a friggin' ghost had nothing to do with his embarrassment.

Christine said...

I had a dream about doing it with a ghost once. Not bad...

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