I recently went back home to Houston and watched a VHS that had two of my favorite childhood movies on it. It was very different watching them 10 years later. I noticed they have a lot in common. The main characters have similar names (Davey and David), both films are adventures, etc. I’m going to breakdown and compare the two, and plan on crowning the winner as The Best Childhood Movie Ever. I will buy the winner on DVD, and post it in my blog profile under ‘Favorite Movies’. A lot is on the line; lets get going…
Quick Descriptions of the movies for those who haven’t seen them:
Cloak & Dagger
Davey is a 11-year-old who’s had a rough stretch. His mother just died and his father, an Air Force pilot, is never around. Davey, who is obsessed with war games and espionage, turns to his imaginary friend Captain Jack Flack for company. On a trip to the vending machine, Davey sees 3 scary looking dudes shoot some scientist. Before the bloody scientist falls down 20 flights of stairs, he gives Davey a “Cloak & Dagger” video game cartridge and tells Davey to find the Feds. Davey finds out its hard to contact the Feds when 3 dudes are chasing and shooting at you, and have kidnapped your best bud Kim and broken into your house and other crazy shit. He tries to get help but no one believes him because he is always talking about spies and guns and stuff like that. Eventually these old people with 3 fingers help him but they turn out to be Russian spies. From there it’s a struggle to save Kim, the country, and his relationship with his father. A lot to ask from an 11-year-old.
Flight of the Navigator
David is a normal 12-year-old with an annoying kid brother. On the July 4th, 1978, David’s mom asks him to go to the neighbor’s house to pick up his brother. Well for whatever reason David has to walk through a scary, dense forest to pick up his brother. After his kid brother jumps out of a tree, scares him, and runs off, David falls into a little ravine. He gets up a minute later and walks back to his house. He gets home…but his brother isn’t there. In fact his whole family is missing. Because it’s freaking 1986. He disappeared for 8 years and no one had seen him since. He is reunited with his family (who are all old as shit now), but everyone wonders where he has been and why he hasn’t aged. David doesn’t remember anything. At the same time as David’s reappearance, some space ship crashes in the same area. The geniuses at NASA think there may be some correlation, and David and the space shuttle go to NASA base for research. After a day of testing, the space ship talks to David in his sleep and so he sneaks onto the shuttle and they take off. This robot/alien thing named Max explains that he took David for a few hours, but couldn’t drop him off at his normal time period like he usually does because his ship was busted or something. So after they fly around for a while David and Max take a risk and try to travel through time.
Flight starts out with shots of a Dog Frisbee-Catching Contest. These badass dogs are jumping and running in slow-mo trying to catch frisbees. Sweet 80’s music is playing. In C&D, we see Jack Flack parachute on top of some Russian spy, and then he kills this hot chick because she tried to shoot him. He’s running around is Moscow when all the sudden these huge dice start rolling towards him.
Winner: Flight of the Navigator: This one was close but Flight’s music is money. Plus there is some shitty shaggy dog that jumps up and can’t catch the frisbee and I totally lol.
Majority of Flight was in the console of the space ship. They stopped once in a cow field but that was boring. C&D was filmed in San Antonio, and there was a freaking badass scene on the Riverwalk where the bad guys tried to stab Davey on one of those yellow tour boats that you can float around on. Also Davey goes to the Alamo and starts stealing. Probably the 2nd greatest thing ever to happen at the Alamo after the Texans overwhelming defeat of shitfest Santa Anna.
Winner: Cloak & Dagger: The Alamo? Easy choice.
In Flight, David flew around in a silver space ship. In C&D, Davey had a bus pass so he rode around on that. Sometimes Davey would get captured and he’d be in the trunk of a Cadillac with a dead guy. And once, in a bad part of town, Davey convinced this taxi driver to take him to the airport for free.
Winner: Cloak & Dagger: Oooo this one may cause a controversy! But that space ship looked like a gay seashell. And I really like that Davey was responsible and had a bus pass.
In C+D there is only one female over the age of 10 shown, and she’s killed after about 6 seconds on screen. Flight has a teenage Sarah Jessica Parker as a NASA intern. She has pink hair and is hooot.
Winner: Flight of the Navigator: No contest…Parker was way hot before she completely ruined womankind with SATC.
Even though it was filmed in the 80’s, only one person in Flight of the Navigator had a moustache. He was the mean director of NASA, and his moustache was a pale gray and very thin. In C&D, Captain Jack Flack has a very handsome, bushy moustache that looks very sleek when he is helping Davey. Also a bad guy has an equally impressive moustache that must have been very intimidating for Davey.
Winner: Cloak & Dagger: Grey=Gay, Brown=Crown. I was very pleased with the thick, sleek moustaches in C&D…an obvious winner.
I guess Flight of the Navigator was a feel good movie. But I’m not even going to get into it because C&D made me tear up. When Davey threw down the Captain Jack Flack game piece and stomped on it, it broke my heart. And I watered up when Jack started to bleed and told Davey that he could do it on his own.
Winner: Cloak & Dagger: I’m not joking about the tearing up…GREAT scene
Davey was a fucking stud kid. He was so smart and basically did everything right. Once this guy was shooting a silenced pistol at him and he ducked around a corner. He calmly asked Captain Jack Flack why they were shooting at him. Most kids would have started crying and give away their position and just be shot. Not Davey. Also Davey carried a ‘nade in his backpack. Sure it was a fake ‘nade but are you kidding me? Davey was also quick as shit. He outran 3 grown men. And he was badass at video games. And he talked with Captain Jack Flack even though he was invisible. He always won at board games and hmm let me think… HE KILLED 3 GUYS. One guy flew out of his van when he was trying to run over Davey in a phone booth. Another guy got shot 19 times by his buddy because Davey (with the help of Jack) set them up in crossfire. And the 3rd guy Davey just shot with a pistol. Actually now that I’m thinking about it I can’t imagine a more badass kid. He was so calm even though Kim was about to blow up, the old people had the national secrets, guys were shooting at him, people at the Alamo thought he was a punk, he had to chill in a trunk with a dead Morris, he was taken hostage at an airport, he was holding a bomb, he was thrown out of a plane, some bloody scientist gave him a disk, he lost his bus pass, and he fell and hurt his knee.
In contrast, David in Flight of the Navigator was a pussy. He was always afraid and whining. “If I go back to NASA they’ll test me again and blah blah blah.” Shut up. “I want to go back to 1978! This isn’t my home. Waaaaaaa!” You went ahead 8 years. You got to ride around in a space ship. That’s a LOT better than getting shot at like Davey. His mother died and all this shit is happening to him and he’s not complaining. Sack up.
Winner: Cloak & Dagger: Davey kicks ass and so does this movie. C&D takes it in a 5-2 victory.
If you haven’t checked out this movie yet, I’ll own it in a week or so. Come watch. We’ll party. C&D Style.
"Kim: It's not fair. Jack Flack always escapes. How does he do it, Morris? I had ten times as many bullets.
Morris: Yeah, but Flack had ingenuity and the contacts, Kim. That's better than bullets sometimes."